Communicating With Teenagers

1 in 5 high school freshmen are sexually active, and by senior year, that triples to nearly 3 in 5.  

This is the same ratio as seniors that have, at minimum, experimented with alcohol or drugs.

Source: 2017 Youth Risk Behavior Survey

While most parents are aware of these growing trends, they also tend to assume that “it must be the other kids at their school.” 

However, there are the things you know about your kids – such as their grades, the things they talk to you about, what you know about their friends and social circle – and then, there are the things you don’t know, like what they really talk about with their friends, how much they have already experimented with drugs and sexual behavior, what they watch and text to each other on their phones, their ways of getting around your security measures, how they’re being treated by their peers or how they’re treating their peers, if they’ve ever had thoughts of self harm or harming others, etc.  From their point of view, this system works well for both sides – the kids don’t want the parents to know, and the parents are happier when they don’t know.  

But, we are living in the age of social media and “hook up culture,” where kids are valuing themselves so incredibly low that they are hardly even seeing each other as humans anymore – just objects that are meant to be used for validation and acceptance.

It’s only logical that their dependency on the acceptance of others is at the root of why things like depression and anxiety are on the rise, not to mention addictions to social media, among other addictions, and any poor, short-sighted and unnecessarily risky decisions they make. 

This is not meant to scare you, but rather, to make you aware that it’s highly likely that the problems you might be having with your kids are not your biggest problems with your kids, and that your biggest problems are the problems you probably don’t even know about. 

By the time issues like low academic performance or motivation, or their defiant attitude and lack of respect for authority come to your attention, the hidden problems that you know nothing about are liable to be the far greater danger.   

Of course, it is possible that your perception is actually accurate and that your kids truly aren’t participating in any high risk activities, but that doesn’t mean that they are not coming in contact with others that are, and that they won’t eventually become influenced by them.  

That is why it’s critical that you are an even greater influence in their life.

The ability to influence is absolutely necessary for raising teens – they literally depend on your guidance, even when they’re rejecting it.  In fact, when they’re rejecting it is probably when they need it the most. 

You need to be able to know how to get through to them effectively because, no matter how much you try to protect them, you cannot be there to shield them from everything.  

When you’re not around, the only thing in your power to play any sort of role in their decisions is your influence.

A Free Influencing Course For Parents

My name is Ava Sharma and I’m a communication and mindset coach, specializing in motivating and influencing kids, and in this free course, I share with you 11 of the best influencing strategies for opening up the lines of communication between parents and kids. 

By the end, you’ll know how to resolve conflicts easily, hold them accountable, and get them to willingly cooperate and openly communicate with you. 

These methods have helped hundreds of parents and kids develop a deeper understanding and appreciation for each other, and I’m certain they will do the same for you.

Who this course is for:

This course is perfect for parents that:

• are struggling with getting their teen/tween to open up to them.
• have tried various methods of accountability and communication, only to get an attitude or the bare minimum in return.
• often feel misunderstood and/or unappreciated by their kids.

What you will learn:

In this 5 module audio course (total length: ~1 hour), you will learn: 

• 4 Tactics for behavior correcting, 
• 4 Tactics for influencing your kids to do something they don’t want to do, and 
• 3 Tactics for effectively holding them accountable.

And much more!

Why am I offering this course for free?

I frequently write articles relating to teenagers and helping them develop a growth mindset, and this course is my way of building up an audience of parents that I can share my content with.  If that sounds fair to you, I’d be honored to have you on board!